One Rule For Summer School


Open up on a scene of me, watching a movie.  This is a fairly common occurrence.  The movie is Summer School.  It stars Mark Harmon, a skinnier Kirstie Alley, and a few other people.  Then I get to the end of the movie.  Mark Harmon makes out with a dog!

Does this constitute beastiality?  Isn’t beastiality illegal?  Yet it is in this movie and not through the magic of editing.  He makes out with the dog and we see it all.  There is penetration of tongues.  Not only is the dog’s tongue in Mark Harmon’s mouth...Mark Harmon’s tongue gets into the dog’s mouth.  That’s double penetration!

Did Turner make out with Hooch?  No.  Did Timmy make out with Lassie?  Not that I know of.  Did Charles Grodin ever take Beethoven, his Saint Bernard, into his arms and swap spit?  Hell no he didn’t.  And I’ll tell you why.  It is not proper to have interspecies erotica and it’s even worse to slap that onto a movie that is going to be shown to the public.  What you do in your own home is your own business.  It does not need to be shared on the big screen for everyone to see.

You can love a dog with all your heart.  You can cry when it’s hurt, be happy when the dog is happy.  What I don’t want is people making sexual advances on their pets.  A dog is man’s best friend, not man’s sexual partner.  If a man needs a sexual partner, he should find a lady.  Or a man if that’s his preference.  Mark Harmon had Kirstie Alley beneath him on a beach when he decided to stop kissing her and start kissing the dog.  There is something wrong with that man.  80s Kirstie Alley was an alright looking lady.

Now enough of that.  The dog kissing did get a laugh out of me as the movie ended.  I guess I shouldn’t be so harsh on it.  Not everyone can make an interspecies sexual act seem quite so funny.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Is "Real Steel" Like "Over the Top"?

When I was going through my weekly movie binge a couple weeks ago, I stumbled upon two movies that I had never seen before that tackled a very similar story.   It was an odd thing to have happen because I didn’t know of any similarities between the two movies.   The first was Real Steel, a movie about a man who participates in robot boxing while bonding with the son that he had left years before.   The second was Over the Top, a movie about a man who participates in arm wrestling while bonding with the son that he had left years before.   Similar?   I think so. Let’s begin with Real Steel.   I watched this one because, why the hell not?   I quite enjoyed the movie and by the end I was rooting for Hugh Jackman’s character to help his robot, Atom, to a victory.   The thing to point out about Real Steel is how good the visual effects were.   I wasn’t expecting too much going in, but I thought they masterfully crafted each robot in a way that it entirely fit its surroundings and didn’t
Read more

Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: Season 2, Episode 8: The Power Stealer

Image
Last time we sat down with the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers , Tommy was going through some serious stuff.   His powers were running low because Lord Zedd was targeting him.   He felt hopeless.   His friends were comforting him.   There was also a Robo Goat trying to take a powerful sword and use it against the Earth.   There were fights all over the place and an emotional hook that was unmatched in any episode that wasn’t in a multi-part arc. This episode, there might be follow-up to the Tommy storyline.   It would be nice to see more of the struggle with his powers.   Right now, that’s the one throughline that has been playing out.   II hope this episode continues to have some sort of meaning to the overall story, instead of being a self-contained and meaningless.   The show needs to grow and evolve, with a storyline that builds to something significant.   Having episodes that keep the story at a standstill is boring.   The story needs to move forward.   Will this episode d
Read more

A Short Description of how Baby's Day Out (1994) is a Live Action Cartoon

Image
Animated movies have been a large fixture throughout cinematic history.   There is currently an Academy Award category devoted entirely to animated features.   They are an important part of the cinematic landscape.   Movies would be completely different if not for the animated films that have been popular throughout the past century. Children have always been a large part of the popularity of cartoons.   This has not been solely a movie based genre.   Television also thrives on animated shows.   As a child, I can remember watching cartoons on Saturday mornings.   In the children’s cartoons, characters could be forced into dangerous predicaments, get injured or nearly killed, and continue on with their lives as if nothing ever happened to them.   This was the way of cartoons such as Looney Toons , where Elmer Fudd, Wile E. Coyote, Daffy Duck, and Yosemite Sam would always suffer great physical trauma, then return to their normal selves in the next scene. This is probably
Read more