The Horror-Like Movie Marathon Wrap Up Part 2


Welcome one and welcome all.  You have arrived here at day two of the Horror-Like Movie Marathon Awards.  Tonight we continue honouring the best and worst of the 31 movie marathon with awards that range from...well, you’ll see.  Why ruing the fun?  It’s time to get on with the show so here is the first award.

The first award in tonight’s portion is the award for best animal actor in a movie.  This is real animals, people.  Not the piranhas from the Piranha films.  The first nominee is a dog.  Actually, let’s call this the Woof.  This is for the best dog in a movie.  Our first nominee is the dog from Trick ‘R Treat.  He’s in a couple of scenes and does some solid acting work with a night vision like mask.  The next nominee (runner up) is the dog from the first Halloween.  That dog is the first non-human kill in that series.  The fifth movie in the series also produces a dog kill and a nominee.  Then you have our fourth runner up, the dog from the 1978 version of Piranha.  That dog barked as his owner lost his legs.  What a nice caring dog.  We have finally come to our winner.  The winner of the Woof is the dog from the 1995 remake of Piranha, playing the same part as the 1978 dog but doing it better.  Not only did this dog bark at the water, it later jumped in to try and kill the piranha, then had to act out a death by piranha.  That is a talented dog.

After that jumbled mess of an award we have moved on to embrace the most reminiscent movie of another.  Two movies were up for this award and each of them had their shot at winning the prize, an award titled the “Writer See, Writer Write”.  The two movies in contention for this award were Piranha from 1978 and Sleepaway Camp from 1983.  Sleepaway Camp was a take on the original Friday the 13th movie.  A bunch of kids at a camp, an unseen killer murdering them.  That’s basically the same plot.  Piranha is a Jaws like film where instead of a shark in the ocean, it is a school of Piranha in a river.  I’m going to give the award to Piranha.  Piranha earned this award with the opening scene where two teenagers go swimming where they aren’t supposed to be and get killed by the fish while swimming.  And they’re naked.  Piranha, hold this up high.  You and your remake have both won awards tonight.

It is now time for a musical number.  Every awards show needs one, even Miss America. 
“If you open your eyes, and look right beside you, you’ll see lots of other movies there to steal your prize. 
When you get nominated, you’ll probably get dominated, because as a film you’re more likely to be criticized. 
And when it’s over, you’ll have nothing, unless you won something, in which case you won.
Not that it matters, most of you were disasters, but most of the movies were rather fun.”
Not the best of songs, not the worst of songs.  Onto some more awards.

The Most Surprisingly Decent award, for the most surprisingly decent movie, goes easily to Leprechaun in the Hood.  No runners-up were necessary for this award as Leprechaun in the Hood was the standout.  After a series that had two terrible movies and two that were just there, this one got me slightly invested.  If I need to put a runner up in there, it would be Halloween 4 for its semi-working character building.  But Leprechaun in the Hood takes this award.

The final two awards for this portion shall be the following.  The Best Rewatch and the Worst Rewatch.  This is where we begin getting into the main course of the awards.  The three movies that I’m putting into contention for best rewatch are Halloween (1978), Piranha 3-D, and Trick ‘R Treat.  The three movies I’m nominating for worst rewatch are Halloween 6, Halloween (2007), and Sleepaway Camp 3: Teenage Wasteland.  Removing one from each category would remove Piranha 3-D and Halloween (2007) from the mix.  Now I’m down to two contenders for best and two for worst.  What shall the winner/loser be?  Time for the big reveal!  Of course Halloween (1978) was the best rewatch.  Every time you watch that movie, you forget one or two of the amazing parts.  It is straight forward, yet subtle about some things.  The aesthetic is so well done.  Just check my blog entry about it.  Now onto the worst rewatch.  Halloween 6 takes that one, no problem.  I remember kind of liking it the first time I saw it.  Now I have no idea why.  Maybe I hyped it up because Paul Rudd is in it.  I don’t know.  Anyway, worst rewatch.

Congratulations to all the winners tonight.  Dog from Piranha (1995) winning the Woof.  Piranha (1978) won the “Writer See, Writer Write” award.  The Most Surprisingly Decent award went to Leprechaun in the Hood.  The winner of Best Rewatch was Halloween (1978). And taking home the prestigious Worst Rewatch was Halloween 6.  Cherish these awards, you’ll not get any others like them.

Tomorrow we conclude the awards ceremony by celebrating the best and worst in acting, deaths, and movies.  See you then.

Comments

  1. Sammy VNovember 2, 2011 at 1:23 AM

    Good choice for the best rewatch. Halloween gets better with age. Trick 'r Treat is a good runner-up. It's one I appreciate more with each revisit.

    You've almost convinced me to give Leprechaun in the Hood a chance. Almost.

    ReplyDelete
  2. JurassicGriffinNovember 3, 2011 at 12:51 AM

    Leprechaun in the Hood is slightly offensive but enjoyable at the same time. It's definitely my favourite of the Leprechaun films.

    And yes, Halloween is like a fine wine and gets better with age.

    ReplyDelete

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